Author: Lostiawen

E-mail: Lostiawen

Rated: NC-17

Pairing: EB/OB

Summary: Orlando hates his baby pictures. 

Archive: Mirrormere, VOLA.  All others please ask.

Feedback: Yes, please.

Warnings: Phone sex, wanking. 

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, none of this really happened.  The author is not associated with or is implying anything about the sexual preferences or the lives of the people depicted within. 

Author´s Notes: This was originally written in Nov. , but I pulled it after the big kerfluffle over Orlando´s baby pictures being posted to the Net.  Well, since they´ve been published in a print magazine, I figure that it´s okay to post it again. 

Happy big 4-0, Beth!! To celebrate, I cobbled together this belated ficlet about one of your favorite pics -- the chair photo with 11 year old Orlando.  Enjoy!

Posted Nov.  9, 2007

Orlando was pulled out of a fairly pleasant dream by the loud ring of his mobile. He cracked an eye open and groaned. It was only 4 in the bloody a.m. Didn´t Eric have a watch? 

"Somebody better be dying. Do you know what time it is?"  he grunted. 

"I can´t fucking believe it, you heartbreaker!"  Eric replied. 

"Huh?"  He definitely wasn´t awake enough for this nonsense. "What in bloody hell are you yabbering on about?"

"Your baby pictures." 

Orlando stared at his mobile and wondered if someone had spiked Eric´s drink. Orli had been very careful to avoid the bane of all couples - having your Mum trot out all of your embarrassing baby pictures. It wasn´t easy, but he had learned to steer the conversation clear of any such thing whenever Eric was over. 

He also learned to spot when his Mum got that maternal look in her eye. As soon as she did that, Orlando would grab a ball and toss it past Sonia. Sidi would then launch himself after it, knocking over furniture, teacups, people...and the dreaded hauling out of the naked baby pictures would pass. 

Eric had taken it all in stride, even though *his* Mum had thoroughly humiliated him already. On Orli´s second visit, she hauled out the photo album and proudly displayed pictures of baby Eric. Orlando had a good laugh over Eric´s Dumbo-sized ears, less than fashionable clothes, and his tendency run around without a stitch on him. 

Still, Eric knew that Orlando was very self-conscious about his baby pictures, so he never pushed the issue. Which is why this mumbling over how cute he was didn´t make a bit of sense at all. 

"Eric, what in fuck are you going on about? Did you just fly out to Canterbury on a lark and ring up my Mum?" 

"Your baby pictures were posted to the Net." 

At the sound of "pictures" and "Net", Orlando exploded out of bed. He couldn´t boot his computer fast enough. "Oh holy fucking shite! When? Where?" 

His Mum had plenty of photos to make Orlando cringe - ones where he was peeing into the bath, or running around starkers with a string tied around his waist, and then there was that incident with the neighbour´s dog...there were too many to count, and he hoped to God that the worst ones had not been leaked. 

It took a few tries and some patient direction from Eric before Orlando could find the website. Once he did, though, the bottom fell out of his stomach. "Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! That fucker Bast! Not the one with the white sweater!"  Orlando cursed. 

"What´s the matter with it?" 

Orlando was about ready to kill Eric for being so thick. "I look like a bloody *girl*, for fuck´s sake! God, everyone used to ask my Mum why she wasn´t dressing me in pink when they saw me!" 

Eric´s answer wasn´t reassuring at all. "I hate to tell you this, but people already think you look like a girl. How many blokes thought Legolas was female?" 

"Sod off, you cunt."  Orlando was feeling very, very stroppy at this point. He thought that Eric would at least be the sympathetic, loving boyfriend instead of taking the piss. Time to fight back where it would hurt the most. "Eric?" 

"Yes?" 

"Forget about getting any sex for the next five years."  Orlando pulled the phone away from his ear and was about to hang up when he heard Eric sputtering something. His curiosity got the better of him, so he decided to hear Eric out. "What was that?" 

"I said, ´Would it help if I told you that you were a damn cute 11 year old?´"

Now that was more like it. "Go on..."

"If I had known you then, I´d probably be ticking off the days until you were legal. Hell, I don´t think I could´ve waited until you were sixteen." 

Orlando laughed. "I couldn´t wait either." 

"You probably had scads of blokes eating out of your hand, didn´t you?"  Eric´s voice had pitched down to a sultry tone and Orlando quite liked where this was going. 

He decided to give Eric a nudge. "More than you can imagine. And I always had a big queue of men lined up during my raver days." 

"At the ripe old age of eighteen..." Eric´s voice was dripping with sarcasm. 

"Oh, sod off," Orlando giggled. "Just think...if you had been in London, you could have been dancing in a warehouse filled with wall to wall people. And then I would have come out of the crowd, shirtless and dressed in tight jeans." 

"And sweaty from dancing," Eric added. "I can just see your curls plastered to your head, and your chest glistening in the light." 

Orlando heard a soft moan at the other end, and he knew by the slight hitch in Eric´s breath that he had reached down to touch himself. That knowledge caused Orlando to harden in response. 

He slid his hand down and squeezed his cock before he spoke to Eric again, using his huskiest voice. "Yeah, and I would probably start by petting you all over, then running my hands through your hair. You´d feel so damn good that I´d have to unbutton your shirt so that I could feel your chest..."

"Tease. You know I can´t resist that."  Eric was panting on the other end of the line. Orlando bit back a groan when he heard the sound of a zipper descending followed by breathy exclamations of surprise. In his mind´s eye, Orlando could see Eric fisting his large shaft, tugging on it before he squeezed the tip to milk out a bead of moisture. 

Cursing softly, Orlando reached between his legs and began to run his finger along the underside of his erection, tracing the vein. His body was tingling as he listened to Eric´s moans. "So what are you going to do? I´m being a naughty boy." 

He heard a sharp intake of breath before Eric replied, "I´m going to grab you and slam you against the wall; let you feel how hard you´ve made me." 

Orlando´s eyes fluttered. He could picture it as if he was there -- pinned against the wall in a darkened room, with Eric pushing his crotch against Orlando´s own. He would only put up a token resistance before he was overwhelmed by lust. "Oh...yes..."

"How badly do you want it?"  Eric growled. 

"God...just get my jeans off and fuck me right now! I don´t care if everyone is watching!" 

"Good," Eric purred in a deep, lust-filled voice. "I´m going to yank your trousers off and pick you up off the floor, letting my hands squeeze your tiny little arse." 

Orlando whimpered and began tugging on his cock, moaning freely into the receiver. "You don´t have to wait...I´ve already had two men in the back. I´m all lubed up." 

His breathy declaration caused Eric to hiss. "You slag. I should have known that you´ve already had someone. I´m not going to waste time, then. I´m just going to unzip and slam my cock into your soaking wet hole." 

That imagery sent heat crackling through Orlando´s body and he couldn´t keep sitting upright. He scampered back to the bed and rolled onto the mattress, almost upsetting the nightstand when he yanked it open. Seconds later, he grabbed his bottle of lube and spread the gel on his fingers before he pushed them in, imagining that Eric was filling him. 

He let out an whorish sounding moan as his fingers grazed his prostate. "Fuck, yes! Just like that!" 

"I´m going to shag you hard, Orli. Pound into you until you can taste my cock in your mouth." 

Orlando whimpered and pumped his fingers inside of him, imagining the oppressive heat of the warehouse, the strobe lights flashing and capturing every thrust of Eric´s hips. The low throb of the techno music echoed the rhythm of their shagging, in sync with their bodies coming together. He could see himself with his legs wrapped around Eric´s waist, helpless to do anything but let himself get fucked until he forgot his own name. 

"Eric..." he moaned, "I´m close..."

"Do it, baby. Come for me." 

Those husky words were enough to send Orlando over the edge. With a loud cry, he thrust once more into his hand and climaxed, arching off the bed and splattering his chest with long, white ropes of liquid. 

Orlando heard Eric shouting out his name as he orgasmed moments later. He smiled and ran his fingers through the puddle on his torso, delicately licking his fingers clean. Once Eric´s breathing had normalized, Orlando said, "Okay, I guess you´re forgiven now." 

A low chuckle answered him. "You really were adorable. Especially with that picture of you straddling the chair. I didn´t look half as good as you did at that age." 

Orlando giggled. "I know, your Mum showed me when you were out fetching some stuff for her at the grocer´s. You were all ears and feet! And that plaid polyester suit, man, talk about looking like a complete git..."

There was dead silence on the line. "Orlando?" 

"Yes?" 

"Don´t bother ringing me up for the next few days. I´m don´t feel like talking to you," Eric said before he abruptly hung up. 

Orlando winced when he heard the dial tone. He had put his foot into his mouth again and now Eric was narked. He needed to fix it, but he wasn´t sure how. He sank deep into thought while he cleaned himself up, trying to figure out a way to get back on Eric´s good side. 

***
Eric was tired when he came back to the hotel. He loved the script for The Time Traveler´s Wife, but it was quite demanding to film. It had been a couple of days since he had last spoken to Orlando, and he was regretting his last words to his boyfriend. He knew that Orli hadn´t intended to be mean, but there was only so much piss he could take about his baby pictures, especially since Orlando was so touchy about his own. 

He was still mulling this over when one of the people at the front told him that he had a package. As Eric took it, he noticed that it was practically mummified by the huge amount of packing tape wrapped around it. He wondered at first if it was a bomb sent by a mad fan, but then he saw the West Hollywood return address. 

So it was from Orli. Eric smiled as he stepped into the lift -- it was most likely a peace offering, since neither of them could stay mad at the other for long. Once Eric was back inside his room, he attacked the package with a pair of scissors, eager to see what was inside. 

After clearing out a ton of newspaper, he found another mummified box. It was rather small, and it was marked "Fragile!!!"  over every square inch. 

Eric laughed when he saw that. Orlando should have written that on the outer box, but he probably got distracted by either Sidi, Robin, or just something shiny and remembering to write out the warning just slipped completely out of his head. He was still snickering when he finally got the box open. The contents were quite odd -- there was only a digital camera inside and a folded-up sheet of paper. 

Perhaps the note would explain things. Eric opened it and read Orlando´s message, written in his loopy scrawl. "Hey, Eric. I couldn´t figure out how to get the pictures onto the computer, so I sent you the camera instead. Make sure no one else is in the room before you look." 

So Orlando had sent him naughty photos. It was just the thing he needed right now, but he wanted to enjoy them properly. He stripped down and lay down on his bed, running a hand along his cock before he hit the playback button. 

The first photo was not what he expected at all. Orlando was straddling a chair that had been turned backward, wearing jeans, a t-shirt, and Eric´s sheepskin coat. His hair had been slicked back, and he was leaning forward so that his arms were resting on his thighs while he smirked at the camera. 

Eric laughed as soon as he saw the picture. Orlando had duplicated that photo that had been posted of him at 11. Same clothes, same exact pose -- the only difference was the wicked glint in Orlando´s eyes, challenging Eric to continue. 

Eric was more than willing, so he hit the advance button. The next photo was closer to what he was looking for. Orlando had shed the shirt, but he left the coat and the rest of his clothes on. His large nipples peeked out, and the smooth expanse of his torso was barely visible underneath the shadows cast by the coat. 

He looked so tempting that Eric began stroking himself, imagining that he was running his tongue over that baby-soft skin as Orlando writhed underneath him. He teased, sucked, and nibbled every patch he could get his hands on, until Orlando was a glorious mess. 

Eric was still quivering when he pulled up the third photo, and he almost came right then and there. Orlando was still wearing the coat, but his only other garment was a pair of leather chaps. He was sitting in that same wide-legged pose, displaying his uncovered crotch and rather prominent hard-on. His mischievous expression had turned to one of lust. 

Eric couldn´t wait any longer. He tugged on his cock rapidly, moaning as he fantasized about bending Orlando over the back of the chair, watching his hard-on sinking in between Orli´s round cheeks. His hand blurred as he pictured himself pounding into Orlando, admiring the way the black leather framed his wee arse. 

That last bit was all that Eric needed and he cried out, shuddering as he came hard. Orlando´s name was on his mind as he drifted in a warm cocoon of bliss, unaware of the passage of time or space. 

When Eric eventually came down, he decided to fast forward to the very last picture. Orlando was sprawled across the chair, completely starkers except for the trails of moisture dappling his chest. He was holding a small sign in his hands, but the writing was too small for Eric to read at first. There was a button to increase the magnification, and Eric did so, shifting the picture until the letters drifted into view. 

It was a very short sentence -- "Aren´t you glad I´m legal now?" 

Eric was guffawing as he picked up his mobile. He definitely intended to tell Orlando how glad he was. Over and over again. 

THE END

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