Author: Lostiawen

E-mail: changeling@planetx.org

Rated: NC-17

Pairing: VM/OB

Summary: Aftermath of the Fall. ..

Archive: Please ask.

Feedback: Yes, please.

Warnings: AU, romance, sap, some angst, creepiness. 

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, none of this really happened.  The author is not associated with or is implying anything about the sexual preferences or the lives of the people depicted within. 

Author´s Notes: Dedicated to those who have lost a loved one. 

Thanks to Linda, whose chatty Orli in "Pure Love" and "Infinite Love" was such an inspiration for my Orli.  *mwah*

I´m sorry that this chapter was delayed.  In addition to being enormous, I accidentally deleted about 500 lines of it earlier in the week, d´oh! :(

Posted June 20, 2003

That shit people tell you about your life flashing before your eyes right before you die? Well, I can personally say it´s a bunch of bollocks. I didn´t have enough time to see everything before I hit the ground. 

I hear the sickening crunch of my back breaking. Fuck... the pain is worse than I remembered...things going black... pain´s gone now, though...huh, that´s odd, I feel weightless. 

I open my eyes, and I´m back at Viggo´s house. What the fuck? 

Then, I feel the touch of Viggo´s mind. /Orlando?/ I turn around, and there he is, right beside me. 

/Fuck! You scared me!/ Oh shit, I can see him and respond to him, which means that I´m a ghost...

/You´re not dead, Orlando. Not yet./

/What???/

/Your spirit detached itself from your body because you´re hovering at the brink of death. I brought you here so that we could talk./

Sodding Viggo. Still interfering in everything. /What the fuck makes you think I´m interested in listening to you?/

/Please.../

/Just bugger off and let me rest in peace, Viggo. It´s over./ I try pushing him out, and it doesn´t work. Argh! I´m stuck here. 

/So how long in the fuck are you going to hold me hostage? Is this your twisted idea of revenge?/

Viggo glares at me. /Orlando, what have I done to you to deserve this abuse?/

/Bugger, do I have to go into it again? You lied to me, in both lifetimes. Do you know how many times I´ve extended my trust to people, only to have them fuck me over?/

/I´m sorry for what happened to you in the past, Orlando, but you´re being unfair to me./

/Fuck you./

He says quietly, /Orlando...what would you have done if I had told you that you were a reincarnation from the start?/

/I would´ve laughed my arse off at you./ I say, my mental voice sounding incredibly tiny. 

/I could feel your bitterness when you first came to visit me, because I had to touch your mind. I wanted to take it slowly because I was so afraid of scaring you off./

I still a bit narked, though. I don´t need to be babied. /I still think that you could have trusted me a bit more. It would´ve saved me some agony./

/Yes, I should have realized what was happening when the nightmares were keeping you awake./

Fuck, he would have to remind me about them. Thanks for bringing back memories of that humiliating incident, Viggo. /What?! You didn´t know what those were from? Some great fucking mind reader you are./

/I´m not perfect, Orlando. It takes concentration, and I can only get emotional impressions. When you came to me that night, all I could feel was your fear and exhaustion./

/Oh./

/But I still fucked up. And I don´t know what to do now to make you stop hating me./

As he´s talking mentally to me, I can vaguely feel something tickling in the back of my head. What the... I focus as hard as I can on it...oh shit, I´m getting impressions from Viggo. And he´s in pain. Oh my god, he´s in about as much pain as I was when he rejected me. 

Bugger, I can´t believe I was such a wanker. And I now feel like the biggest fuck-up in the world for causing this wonderful man so much agony, because I still do love him. Yes, I love him and I finally see how wrong I was. 

But I still have to know one thing.../Viggo?/

/Yes?/

/What were you telling me when I gave you the Orlando stone? I died before I heard everything./

His eyes close briefly and when they open again, tears are shimmering on the surface. I feel a stronger wave of agony, and when he speaks again, his mental voice is almost a whisper. /I said, ´Orlando, no, please come back. I love you. I love you and I´ll give anything, even parts of my soul, just to have the chance to hold you in my arms again.´/ And even through my unskilled reading, I can feel that his love for me is overwhelming and untinged by guilt. Oh god, how could I have doubted him? Bloom, you are the biggest cock-up in the entire world. 

/I´m sorry that you had to wait another lifetime to hear it, and I´m sure that you don´t believe me. I´ll leave you now, Orlando./

What? He can´t feel my emotions? Oh god, he must be in so much pain that he´s not bothering to read me. My eyes water, and I don´t bother trying to fight back the tears. 

/Viggo, don´t. I forgive you. And I´m the one who cocked it up. I shouldn´t have gotten angry. Please, touch my mind./

I clear my head and just try to let him feel how much I love him. His eyes soften, and I know that we don´t need to say anything. We can feel our love for each other. 

He wraps his arms around me, and although I can´t actually feel him touching me, a pleasant fizz starts going through my body. /I don´t blame you for getting angry, you were frightened from everything I overloaded you with./

/Bugger that. I insist that I was the bigger fuckwit./

/No, I was. I.../

/Viggo? Shut up./ And I silence him by kissing him. Holy. Fucking. Shit. Emotions and impressions flood over and overwhelm me. I feel another set of hopes, fears, memories, thoughts, and at the center of it is a bottomless love. 

I can´t take much more and I break the kiss. Viggo looks as dazed as I feel. 

/Sod it all, what was that all about?/

/I think I know. As spirits, there are very few barriers between our minds. When we kissed, we completely opened up to each other./

/So I felt.../

/...everything that was me. And I felt everything that was you./ /Fuck./ I´m so awestruck that I don´t notice the strong tug pulling my spirit at first. But it builds in force, and I see that a door of white light has appeared. 

A pinch of my skin starts getting pulled towards the door. Viggo looks alarmed. /We´re out of time. You need to rejoin the living as soon as possible./

And if I go back, we´ll never be able to touch for real. Never really be able to spend time as a couple. /No./

/What?/

/Viggo, if I go back to my body, how will we continue to be together? Just seeing you at night is pretty half-arsed./

/If you go through that door, we´ll still be separated./ Fuck, that´s right. He still hasn´t finished his task. 

/Then I´ll stay here./

Viggo shakes his head. /You can´t. Your desire to remain here isn´t strong enough to turn you into a ghost. You either have to go through the door, or you have to go back to your body. If you stay, the door will eventually pull you through, or worse, pull you apart./

I´m still hesitating, and Viggo says gently, /Please go back, angel, we´ll make it work./

I get a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. Fuck, what a decision. /What if my back is so fucked up that I´ll never be able to walk again? I can´t live like that./

/It won´t. I know you´ll get better. Have faith./ Despite the reassuring tone in his voice, I just can´t bring myself to do it. 

/But what if it doesn´t?/ I say weakly. 

/Courage, angel. Face your fears./ And I feel his love and support flooding through me. Shit, he´s said the words that I always say to myself. All right, Bloom, you know what to do. 

Something occurs to me, though. /Shit, I won´t be able to see you when I return. You´ll still be stuck here./

/Not if you let me mentally bind myself to you. It´s similar to possession, but I´ll just be riding in your body instead of taking it over./

/All right. How do we do this?/

/Orlando, in order for the binding to work, you´ll have to open your mind and let me slip in. I´ll have access to all of your thoughts and emotions. Do you trust me to not abuse that?/

God, I love how he never presumes anything, even though I have no more doubts about him. I try to transmit as much confidence in him as I can. /I do. Let´s go./

Viggo grabs my hand. I feel a tingle spreading through me and soon, I can actually feel him in my mind. 

/Now we need to go back to your body together./

/Can we make it in time? The pull is getting stronger./

/I can get us there. Hang on./

Oh shit, we´re flying! We cover the distance back to Edward´s house in a heartbeat. 

Bugger, is that me? My body looks twisted and broken. Fuck, looks like I landed somewhere inaccessible. Inaccessible, that is, unless you were a stupid git who fell from a roof terrace and bounced off a railing. 

/You lead the way, Orlando./

We dive as fast as we can into my body. This is not going to be pleasant. 

Lights...blood...pain. So much pain. Sod it all, I hate it when I´m right. Edward is calling my name. 

"Orli! Orli, can you hear me?"  Edward calls again. 

"Yes..." I gasp. I think there´s blood in my lungs, and it hurts to talk. 

"Hold on man, we´ve called the ambulance." 

I cough up some blood. Motherfucking bollocks, every nerve is screaming at me, and I can barely see. It´s going to be a while before help comes. 

/Angel, concentrate on my voice./ I can´t see Viggo at all, but I feel his warm presence inside of me. I open my mind as much as I can, and he starts talking to me. His voice is soothing, and the pain starts fading down to a faint buzz, distracting me from everything. 

There´s a lot of activity, and I vaguely realize that I´m being loaded on a stretcher. Shit, they´re bringing me out by helicopter. 

As I hear it taking off, Viggo keeps me company and he talks to me the entire way. 

****

I spend most of the next three days listening to Viggo´s soothing voice, and I´m happy that he´s here, otherwise I´d go absolutely nutters from boredom. He can hear and see through me, and he keeps the pain down whenever a doctor or nurse has to do something unpleasant to me. 

Viggo tells me that the binding is taxing, and he has to mentally withdraw daily. He tells me it´s sort of like sleeping, but he´ll still be here when he "wakes up".

Fortunately, it´s easy for me to predict when he´ll be gone, since he´s as regular as clockwork. During the hour that I´m alone, I just lie around in a dopey haze. 

The fantastic thing is that he can still visit me in my dreams. He can´t shag me, though, because I need to stay immobile, and I know that I thrash around a lot in the real world when we´re having it on. Instead, we spend our time cuddling and talking. 

On the fourth day, a grim-faced doctor comes in to have a talk with me.  "Orlando, I´ve looked at your X-rays closely, and I´m afraid that I have some bad news for you." 

Oh, shit. I try to ignore my stomach clenching, and I say bravely, "Yes?" 

"We´re going to operate today, but the damage to your spine was extensive. There´s a very strong possibility that you will never walk again." 

/Don´t worry, angel./ I hear Viggo whispering in my head, and I know that he´s right. 

I calmly reply, "I see. All right, then, I´ll be ready." 

The doctor looks incredibly confused, because I´m not the least bit upset. I plaster a weak, shaky smile on my face and he regains his composure. "Very well. I´ll get the staff prepped," he says as he leaves. 

Heh, never flummoxed a doctor before. /You´ll stay with me during the operation, won´t you?/ I ask Viggo. 

/I´ll be there and I´ll talk to you the entire time./

/That´s all I could wish for./

They come for me in the afternoon, just at the tail end of Viggo´s rest period. He talks to me through the prep work, and he comforts me as the anesthetic takes effect. Unfortunately, it makes me so dopey that I have trouble replying to him. He´s unfazed, and when it´s obvious that I´m too out of it to carry on a conversation, he fills in the time by telling me stories. 

He continues talking to me until I feel myself coming back to consciousness. 

/I need to see you./ I say. 

/All right. Sleep,/ and I drift off again. 

I fling myself into his arms as soon as I appear in the dream world. He summons up a blanket so that we can lie on top of it and cuddle. 

"I still don´t know if I´ll be able to walk," I say. 

"You will. I heard the doctors, the operation went well." 

I sigh. "Yeah. I´m actually pretty sure that I will. I just had to air out that last little doubt. You know, I still have my memories from my previous life. It´s still a bit confusing, because I´m remembering two different things. I´m slowly sorting them out, though."  I kiss Viggo gently. "One thing is for sure, I´ve gotten a new perspective on life and death." 

"Oh?" 

"Uh-huh. On the one hand, I´m not afraid anymore of dying, now that I know it´s not the end-all, be-all of everything. But I´m not going to go daftly to my own death, either. Not very many people are blessed enough to get second chances." 

"I´ll always be thankful that you were one of lucky ones," Viggo says, burying his nose in my curls. 

"And I almost bitched it up. It was amazing how much my anger at you basically poisoned everything I felt. It actually really sucked being a hardcore cynic. I couldn´t enjoy squat, and it almost cost me my life and your love." 

I pause before I continue. "And I was immensely selfish, man. It didn´t occur to me that there was so much more to people, to the world around me. Well, I´m not going to put the blinders on anymore. I know that I´ve been given a precious gift, and I don´t want to waste it. I want to enjoy my second shot at life to the fullest." 

Viggo kisses my head. "I´m glad you came to that realization, angel." 

I laugh. "Christ, I just sounded really old and long-winded just now. But if you think about it, I´m effectively 42." 

Something suddenly occurs to me. "Hey, if I´m that decrepit, that would make you sixty-something, old man."  I grin cheekily at Viggo. "You´re an extremely horny bastard considering that you should be in an old age home right now." 

Viggo chuckles, "It doesn´t quite work that way, Orlando. I perceive the passage of time differently, and the years you spent alive don´t stack with each other." 

I stick my tongue out at him, "Wanker."  Feels good to let myself go and be a bit silly. 

He shuts me up by kissing me, turning me into a little puddle of goo. Hmm, if this is my reward, maybe I should be more of a smart-arse. He ends the kiss with a light swipe of his tongue against my lips, and then he pulls me down so that we can lie back and look at the stars. 

I smile, thinking about the time I actually got to hold one. That was just such an amazing moment, one that I´ll cherish forever. 

As I´m leaning back and sighing, Viggo recites a poem to me; it´s a lovely one, but one line really grabs my attention: "surrender yourself to the touch of destiny´s hands." 

"Viggo, the poem´s about us, isn´t it?" 

He kisses me and says, "Yes. I composed it while I was waiting for you to get out of your operation." 

"I´m honored. I love you so much." 

"I love you, too." 

***

Needless to say, everyone is surprised when I actually walk out of the hospital on crutches twelve days later. Mum brings me over to her place to stay while I´m recovering. 

I won´t go into my convalescence, because it´s boring as all shit. Also, Viggo wasn´t sure if shagging me in the dream world would have bad real world effects, so we still held off during that time. 

Well, okay, there was one interesting thing that happened. My Vicodin wore off sooner than expected one day, so Viggo stayed around and dulled the pain until it was safe for Mum to give me another one. It cut into the very beginning of his rest period, so he had to leave pretty fast. However, just as he was withdrawing I saw a flash of... something...before he was gone. 

That something was achingly familiar, but the more I thought about it, the more it got away from me. I decided to shove it into the back of my mind and deal with it later. 

Before I was released, the doctor cautioned me against indulging in any sort of vigorous activity for the next few months, and that included wanking. I think my bollocks turned a new shade of blue while I was waiting for my back to heal. 

Once I can hobble about a bit on my own, I have a final visit to the doctor, and he gives me a clean bill of health. He tells me to take it easy, but I can otherwise go back to my own flat. 

Sam drives me there and helps me to the door. Thank god that there´s a lift here, or else I´d be in serious trouble. 

I put the key in the lock and swing open the door. Home, sweet home...oh shit! What´s a new bed doing in here? 

"Surprise, Orli," Sam says. "It´s from me and Mum." 

I hug her. "You two are the best." 

"What do you want to do with your old bed? We had the removal men break it down, but we weren´t sure if you wanted to keep it as a spare or if you wanted to flog it somewhere." 

"Just leave it. I´m sure I´ll think of something, Sam." 

"Take care of yourself, baby brother, and try not to break the new bed too soon; especially since you can´t go two days without shagging." 

I stick my tongue out at her before I laugh and hug her again. After she leaves, a wicked idea forms in my head. 

/Viggo?/

/Yes, angel?/

/Can you keep stuff from happening to things that I plonk down in your house?/

/Yes. That´s actually very easy. Why do you ask?/

/Because I was wondering how I was going to stay over with my dodgy back.../

I hear his mental chuckle. /How are you going to move your bed over to my house?/

/I´ll take care of that right now./

I ring a bloke who I know will do odd jobs and he says that he´ll be over. 

When I hang up, Viggo says, /So, is he going to put it together?/

/Yes, but I need you to put the linens on afterward./

/Excuse me?/

/Oh come on, old man. He´ll get really suspicious if I ask him to do it, and I certainly can´t. Please? I´ll make it worth your while./ I say the last sentence with a throaty purr. 

Viggo chuckles. /All right./

When the bloke arrives, he looks at me skeptically when I tell him where I want him to deliver my stuff. 

"There´s nothing there but an abandoned house, mate." 

"Look man, it´s for a dare, okay?" 

He says, "I dunno..."

Viggo says, /Sounds like he´s not buying it. Too bad I can´t leave your body to persuade him./

/I´m glad you can´t! I don´t want to have to clean up the mess when he pisses himself from your sodding cold thingy./

/My ´thingy´ is anything but cold, angel, you should know that./

Argh, just the mention of his cock is starting to give me a hard-on. /Wanker! I´m trying to concentrate./

/I didn´t say anything.../ he says, trying to sound innocent. 

/Yeah, right. I´m sorry, love, but that tone of voice just doesn´t work for you./

/Would you rather have me talk dirty to you, instead?/ I can hear the smirk in his voice. Bastard. 

/Don´t even! I´ve gone without anything for so long that my dick gets stiff from a light breeze./

"Hey, are you okay?"  Shit. Forgot that there was someone else here. Time for a quick excuse... 

"Sorry man, I haven´t had lunch yet, so it´s a little hard to concentrate."  I smile my brightest smile at him. "Come on, I´ll pay you extra for your trouble." 

He doesn´t look convinced. "Half again your usual rate?"  I offer. "I´ll double it if you get it set up within a half hour." 

/Where did you get that kind of money?/ Viggo asks. Shit, that sexy voice of his should be outlawed. 

/Rainy day funds./

The bloke finally says, "All right. Cash up front, though." 

I go into my wardrobe to scrummage for the box where I keep my spare money, and I spy on him out of the corner of my eye. I let out a mental laugh. 

/What´s so funny?/ Viggo asks. Ha, he wasn´t paying attention. 

/He´s checking out my arse. Guess my gaydar´s defective today. I could´ve tried to persuade him with one of my shag-me-rotten smiles./

/That doesn´t always work on everyone. You´re not _that_ irresistible, Orlando./

Damn, how do you pout mentally? 

Viggo purrs, /However, if you smile like that for me, I´d love to throw you down onto the ground.../

/Viggo! I need to think!/

Mercifully, Viggo does keep quiet, and I close the deal. Hmm, a thought just popped into my head. 

/I was just wondering about something.../

/Yes?/

/This binding you´re doing is sort of like possession, yeah? Why can´t you just possess someone so that we can touch each other?/

/You´ve been watching too many movies. Possession is a lot more unpleasant than you think it is. In order to take over a person, I have to force my way in and violate their mind./

/So, it´s like.../

/mental rape. Yes./

/Shit./

/Angel, I have to rest again. If you arrive at the house before I return, go to the back. There´s a small opening there, and if you use it, you won´t have to climb in./

I feel him withdrawing. After he leaves, that little memory that I filed away pops back into my head. Now I know where it´s from: it´s something that I saw in that jumble of overwhelming information shooting through my head earlier. During the time that Viggo and I shared everything. 

Bugger. I wish I had known sooner.  I´m going to have to talk to him about it, but I want to wait until morning. 

I pop over to Viggo´s house, grateful for public transport. I find the opening he was talking about, and I squeeze through with no problem. I work my way back to his room, and I smile as I see my old bed neatly set up inside. 

I timed this right, because I feel Viggo "waking up" at that moment.  /So, will you be kind enough to provide maid service?/  I ask.

/Just give me a few minutes to remove the binding./

His warm presence disappears. Fuck. After having him almost constantly there for months, it now seems like part of me is missing. 

I see the linens being lifted into the air, and I watch with amusement as the sheets get pulled on and tucked in by an invisible Viggo. The cheeky bastard makes hospital corners and then turns out the blankets when he´s done. 

I strip and carefully get in, falling asleep easily. We´ve waited months, and I am not going to get slowed down because I have to doff my clothes. 

We pretty much didn´t waste any time. As soon as I appeared, Viggo promptly jumped me and proceeded to shag my brains out. 

Well, that´s what I wanted him to do. We actually still had to go at it slowly because of my back, but that didn´t stop it from being volcanic in intensity. I swear that I fucking felt the Earth move. 

As we´re cuddling afterward, I breathe out a lengthy sigh of contentment. I can´t believe that I used to hate this. 

"Happy?"  Viggo says. 

"For now. I still want more." 

"We should hold off until I check on your back in the morning." 

I grumble, even though I know he´s right. He kisses the top of my head and says, "I want to give this back to you."  He gestures, and the pendant with the Orlando stone appears in his hand. 

I smile and lean forward so that he can put it on me. I feel the cold touch of it as it first hits my skin, and then it warms, like it was always meant to be there. I flop back against his chest, stroking the pendant gently. "Thank you." 

"And I want to give this back, too," he says as a book appears in his hand. I try to read it, but the letters are wiggly. Okay, I definitely can´t blame my dyslexia on this one. 

"Um, I can´t focus on it." 

He laughs. "I forgot. No one can read while they´re dreaming. You should be able to figure out what it is, angel. You left it here a while ago." 

My eyes grow wide. "´The Fellowship of the Ring?´"

"You never retrieved it after you tossed it into that corner, so I kept it." 

"Don´t tell me you read it." 

He smiles. "What else would I do during the day?" 

I laugh out loud. "Sodding hard read. You can keep it, Viggo." 

He kisses me again. "Take it. I have a feeling that it will be important later." 

"All right." 

I cuddle against him, content for now. I can talk about the memory later. Right now, I just want to enjoy him. We spend the rest of our time talking and just lying against each other. 

Close to morning, I take a deep breath. It´s time to broach the subject I´ve been dreading. 

"Viggo?" 

"Yes?" 

"Finishing the painting isn´t your final task, is it?" 

He looks like he´s going to deny it, but the dead serious look in my eyes freezes him. "No, it isn´t," he says reluctantly. 

"Then what was your fondest wish?"  He hesitates, and I say softly, "Please tell me." 

Viggo lets out a long breath and says, "I wanted to wake up at dawn with you in my arms, and watch the first rays of a new day shine on your beautiful face." 

"But we can´t ever touch, can we?" 

He says quietly, "When I died, I was granted the ability to become solid and real for one night. And one night only." 

I close my eyes briefly. I know what I have to do now. 

"Will you do me a favor?"  I ask. 

"Anything." 

"Finish the painting and then spend the night with me once my back is healed. In the real world." 

"What? Why?" 

"While I was in the hospital, you didn´t really need to rest, did you?"  I look at him pleadingly, silently asking him to tell me the truth. 

"No. I was blocking you. I was keeping you from touching my mind because you didn´t need to feel what I was going through for that hour." 

I put my hand on his. "And I was so busying playing around when we first got together that I didn´t notice your absences. Viggo, you can´t keep doing this. Spend the night with me." 

"It´s not that bad." 

Damnit, I wish he wouldn´t be so noble. "Viggo, don´t bullshit me. I felt it when we shared ourselves. I know that you´re reliving your death every day." 

He closes his eyes and murmurs, "I didn´t want you to find out." 

"It´s not fair of me to keep you here when you suffer like that. When you´ve been suffering like that for the past twenty years." 

He looks at me, and his eyes are dark pools of sadness. "I can´t lose you so soon." 

Shit, come on Bloom, you can do this. "Viggo, we found each other once. If you go to the afterlife, you could get reborn. The longer we put it off, the longer I´ll have to wait to hold you for real." 

"You can hold me here." 

"Only at night. I want to have you with me for longer than that. Besides, it´s selfish of me to keep you here."  I give his hand a squeeze. "I was wondering why we had so long to talk after I fell. I think I was given another chance so that I could help you. You can´t escape your fate, Viggo." 

Viggo lets out a long sigh. He runs his other hand through his hair and finally says, "All right." 

***

It takes another few months before my back heals properly and feels strong enough for vigorous shagging. Until then, I cherish every single extra night that I have with Viggo. However, the day finally comes, and I´ve never both dreaded and looked forward to anything this much. 

I stock up on supplies that we´ll need before I take the bus over to Viggo´s place. On the way there, I contemplate calling it off. 

No. You are going to go through with this, Bloom. Think about the pain he´s going through every day. This is for the best. And maintain a positive attitude, or he´ll pick it up. 

I go in through the back way, trying to think happy thoughts. I ditch my shoes and socks and stuff the bag containing lube and other things under the bed. 

Deep breaths...okay, call him now. 

/Viggo?/

/I´m here, angel./

In the middle of the room, I see something shimmering into view. It´s Viggo. He´s a transparent blue, and he´s lit within by thousands of tiny lights. The lights flare, and I cover my eyes to shield them. As I´m blinking the spots out, I see him standing there. In the flesh. 

My heart thuds and I feel lightheaded. I wobble over to him, and my hand shakes as I tentatively reach out to touch his cheek. I feel the warm texture of his skin, and the scratch of shaved stubble. My breathing is ragged and my heart is pounding as I gently stroke his cheek, still not quite believing my senses. 

Tentatively, I run my fingers down his face, over his throat, and stop at his cloth-covered chest, letting my palm rest lightly over his heart. I tremble again when I feel it fluttering. He really is here. Solid. Alive. 

Viggo looks into my eyes, and covers my hand with his. I gasp, really feeling the rough texture of his hand for the first time. 

We lean to kiss each other. I brush my lips against his before I open my mouth in welcome. 

Oh god. I just combust inside as soon as our tongues slide across each other. As wonderful as our kisses in the dream world were, I could never fully taste him, never fully feel the rush inside that I do now, receiving all of Viggo´s love and finally returning it in kind. Viggo´s waited two decades for this kiss from me, and I give him everything until we have to stop because we can´t breathe anymore. 

As we part, I touch our foreheads together, gazing deep into those breathtaking eyes, so full of love for me. As I drown in those cobalt blue depths, I feel a hunger growing inside of me. 

I´ve only explored his body in the dream world, and it´s not enough. God, I´m not going to be satisfied until I´ve tasted every bit of him and committed it to memory. My cock is hard already, but it´s going to have to wait. 

I lean down and start nibbling on his neck, tasting the salt of his skin and just savoring the texture of it under my tongue. Viggo´s breath hitches as I kiss my way lower, dipping my tongue into the V of his shirt. 

I slowly flick the button open, and I thoroughly map every centimeter of pale skin that gets revealed. Viggo´s knees start buckling, so I guide him over to the bed. 

He pulls us down, going slowly to make sure that my back doesn´t get jolted. I somehow manage to keep my mouth on him the entire time. Once we´re settled, I flick another button open. 

I work my way down his chest this way, kissing, nibbling, and licking everything I can get my mouth on before I pop open another button. Well, with one exception: I leave his nipples alone. Never let it be said that I don´t learn from my elders. 

Viggo starts writhing underneath me, and he lets out a throaty moan when I finally twirl my tongue around his nipple, working it into a stiff peak. He groans when I stop, but there´s so much more of him to explore. 

Once I reach his waistband, I sit back a bit. "Lift up." 

Viggo obediently sits up and I take his shirt off. He pushes my t-shirt up and starts caressing me, but I stop him, even though my body is aching for his touch. 

"Patience," I say to him, moving his hands just to the hem. 

He says thickly, "Angel..."

"Hush. Just enjoy." 

He nods and pulls the t-shirt over my head, licking his lips when he sees that my nipples are already crinkled and hard. I give him a sultry smile as I take his hand and put one of his fingers into my mouth.  He gasps as I suck on it, swirling my tongue over the pad, loving his unique taste. I give each finger a similar treatment before I press my mouth to his palm, tracing the lines with my tongue. 

I nip and lick my way up his arm and then I lavish my attention on his other one. Viggo´s threaded his fingers in my hair, and he keeps stroking my curls as I work my way over his shaking body. 

I finally drag off his shoes, socks, trousers, and boxers. My cock feels way too constricted inside my jeans as I drink in the sight of his beautiful, naked body. Smiling wickedly at him, I pop the button on my jeans and slowly strip out of them. I took off my knickers before I left my flat, and Viggo´s breath hitches as my erection springs free. He growls as I wrap my hand around my cock and slowly stroke it. 

"Orlando," Viggo rasps, "get over here." 

I walk over as sexily as I can and I crawl into bed with him. I´m really tempted to start licking his hard cock immediately, but I´m not finished with his body yet. 

He grunts in protest when I scoot down and start sucking a toe, but I tell him to be patient again. I give his feet a thorough exploring before I work my way up his leg, pausing briefly to draw lazy circles behind his knee with my tongue. 

Viggo makes a noise deep in his throat and grips the sheets in his hands. I smile and blaze a path up his leg, stopping short of his groin before I shift over to his other foot. 

He curses at me, but I continue my slow pace, and by the time I reach the top of his other leg, he´s a complete, delirious wreck. 

He watches me with glazed over eyes as I push his legs up to his chest. I part his hot cheeks, feeling the heat radiating off of them, and I hear him panting in anticipation of what´s coming next. 

I lean in and slowly trace the crack of his arse with my tongue. I hear him starting to moan and I poke my head up to grin wickedly at him. There´s moisture dribbling out of his erection, and I resist the urge to lick it. 

I then dive back down and circle my tongue along his entrance. I´m rewarded with a loud cry from him, so I continue tracing around the pucker, listening to those delicious sounds coming from his lips. 

I keep teasing him until he´s about to explode from the tension. I give one last flick with my tongue before I quickly jab it inside. 

Viggo almost convulses off the bed, but I hold him down. God, he´s so hot inside... I stab my tongue deep within him until he´s writhing and pushing back against me, knuckles turning white as he grips the sheets. Fuck, he´s so sexy when he loses himself like this. I feel my cock dripping, but I want to finish what I´m doing. 

I then back off, and I hear a growl of annoyance from him. Patience, Viggo, I saved the best part for last.  Grinning at him, I blow a hot breath over his cock, feeling an ache inside of me as he responds with a husky moan. 

I close my lips over the head and lap up the precious fluid leaking from the tip. Oh god, I´ve been craving to do this for so long...I roll the salty liquid around on my tongue, enjoying the taste of it. Viggo clutches his hands in my hair, and I know that he´s trying to keep himself from thrusting into my mouth. 

However, I know that I can take his full length, so I relax my throat and gently guide his hips up. I hear him hiss in pleasure as he fully slides in and nestles his cock in the back of my throat. 

I start flicking my tongue around his erection, and Viggo´s control just breaks. He thrusts up hard into my mouth, panting heavily. I take in his thick length, lapping my tongue against it. He starts shaking harder, and then he pulls out, his eyes blazing with lust. 

"Don´t want to...finish that way," he gasps. 

I nod and fish the bag out from underneath the bed. I pull out a bottle of gel and hand it to him. 

As he´s coating his fingers, I lie back and just lightly stroke my cock, if I do anything more than that, I´ll come all over the sheets. 

Viggo drizzles more lube over my entrance before he slowly starts working the tip of a finger inside. Christ, my whole body is going to burst, and I want him to fuck me _now_. 

"Viggo, please! I´m ready." 

"But I don´t want to hurt you."  And I know what he means. Although we´ve shagged countless times, it´s all been in the dream world. But fuck, I _need_ to feel him. 

"I won´t break," I say reassuringly, "I´ve had fingers inside me before. It´ll be okay."  I grab a pillow and put it under my hips for extra support. 

"All right."  And I can tell by the husk in his voice that he´s having problems restraining himself. 

I moan as he slides his finger inside of me. "More," I plead. He quickly adds another, and I start pushing back against them. 

Taking the hint, he adds a third. Fuck, that feels so good..."Viggo...please. Fuck me. Oh god...I need you..." I say thickly, pumping myself on his hand. 

Viggo makes me hold out a bit more, making sure that I´m well lubed before he pulls his fingers out. I whinge at him, but he just smiles patiently while he spreads a generous amount of lube on his erection. 

I spread my legs as wide as I can, and he positions his cock at my entrance. I force myself to relax as he slowly pushes the tip in. 

It´s still a bit uncomfortable, and Viggo pauses while I give myself a little time to adjust. I nod at him. He gives another push, and I gasp. It´s a little much, and I clench him tightly. 

"Easy...just relax," Viggo says soothingly. I concentrate on my breathing, and my body finally eases up. I smile and nod again, and Viggo leans forward to rest on his elbows before he gives another push, finally sliding past the resistant ring of muscle. 

We both hiss as he fills me. Oh god, this is amazing beyond all words. I put my hands on his shoulders, clutching him tightly as he continues to penetrate me slowly, sending every part of me buzzing alive. When he touches bottom, I feel a jolt shake my entire body, and it´s so fucking fantastic that I shout his name. 

"Angel..." he says huskily, "Oh god, you´re so tight..."

We just hold there, feeling the connection between us, our breaths mingling with each other. I can only describe it as magical, and we lose ourselves to it as long as we can.  However, our lust can´t wait, and Viggo soon starts thrusting slowly and it feels so good that I just lose it and cry out. 

I pull Viggo towards me and wrap my legs around his hips. I want to feel his body against mine, feel his lips while he rocks within me. I hungrily kiss him, tangling my hands in his hair, letting myself get swept away. 

I start mewling against his mouth as he picks up the pace, filling me over and over again and gliding over my sweet spot. It doesn´t take long before I start whimpering because I´m close. Viggo sucks on my tongue and reaches down to grab my cock. 

I scream into his mouth as I immediately explode, splashing all over his hand. I grip him tighter, and he breaks our kiss to moan out my name before he comes with a loud roar. 

I shudder as I feel his cock pulsing and filling me with hot liquid for the first time. I look at him, recording his expression, the feel of his body shaking over me, the final gasp that comes out of his mouth before he relaxes. This will be one of my last memories of him, and I want to make sure that I remember everything. 

Viggo pulls out, and I protest a bit, because I want him to stay inside of me. He groggily rolls to one side, and draws me up against his chest. 

I snuggle against him, feeling the heat radiating off his body. I brush my fingers over his face, enjoying the feel of the sweat beading on the surface. I lean in closer so that I can hear the thundering of his heart. Fuck, I´d never thought I´d get to do this, to feel him. 

After a while, we start getting sticky, so I reach into the bag of supplies for some wet-naps. After I wipe us off, I pull out the empty bag that I packed for rubbish, and chuck the soiled stuff in there. 

Viggo chuckles. "You´re very prepared." 

I smile. "I planned for every contingency. I even brought flavored lube in case we wanted to go down on each other after we´ve wiped ourselves off." 

"Should I even ask how much lube you brought?" 

"Enough different types so that we´ll be up most of the night trying them all," I say with a cheeky grin. 

Viggo smiles slyly. "Well then," he purrs, and my cock leaps to attention, "we should start now, so that we can have enough time for each one." 

We didn´t quite stay up all night, but we tried. In the end, we finally dozed off. However, I´m not used to having another person in my bed, so I wake up shortly, enjoying the feel of his strong arms around me, and his head buried in my hair. Our bodies fit together perfectly, almost as if we were made for each other. I shift about so that I can look at his face without waking him up. 

God, Viggo looks so beautiful as he´s sleeping. I trace the lines of his face with my fingers and I smile contentedly. I feel complete now. I´ve given him everything I have, and he´s given me everything in return.  I just sit there, watching him, losing track of time. Eventually, though, I notice that it´s starting to get lighter. 

Shit. 

I feel tears starting to form, and I fight them back. Using every bit of my acting skill, I force myself to smile as I gently shake Viggo awake. 

"Viggo...wake up. It´s almost dawn."  He stirs sleepily, and I take in every detail as those amazing eyes open and slowly come to full alertness. 

Once he´s awake, his eyes are filled with sorrow. I buck up and continue to sweetly smile at him, reaching up to stroke his cheek. "You have to go now," I say steadily. Fuck, I should be knighted for this performance. 

Viggo says quietly, "I´ll come back to you. No matter how long it takes, no matter where you are, I will return."  The unshakeable tone in his voice gives me hope. 

"And I´ll wait for you, even if it takes you another lifetime before you find me." 

Viggo smiles at me. "I want you to have the painting, angel. Take good care of it." 

Breathe, don´t cry..."I will. Oh god, Viggo, I love you so much." 

"I´ll always love you, Orlando." 

We press ourselves together and kiss each other for the last time, pouring all of our love, all of our passion, all of our hope into it. 

As we part, the first light of dawn peeks through the clouds and shines down on the bed. Viggo cups my cheek and caresses it with his thumb, his eyes brimming over with love. I turn my face and kiss his palm gently, wishing that I could suspend time and enjoy this moment forever. 

Suddenly, his breath hitches and he starts turning transparent. I grab his hand and lace our fingers together, keeping the smile on my face as he fades away. 

Far too soon, I can´t feel him anymore, and his features are disappearing. 

He whispers faintly, "Goodbye, angel." 

And then he´s gone. I stare at my empty hand, memories of touching his warm skin still fresh in my mind. 

"Goodbye, love," I say in a shaky voice before I curl up in a ball and cry my heart out. 

I eventually pry myself off the bed and go to the easel. It´s facing the wall for some reason. Huh. Wonder why Viggo turned it backward? I swing it around and gasp. The words to our poem are painted on the corner of the finished portrait. 

"Surrender yourself to the touch of destiny´s hands," I say softly, before the tears start pouring out again. 

----
end part 7

chapter 6
chapter 8
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