Author: Lostiawen

E-mail: Lostiawen

Rated: NC-17

Pairing: OB/VM

Summary: Things take a turn for the worse. 

Archive: Mirrormere, VOLA.  All others please ask.

Feedback: Yes, please.

Warnings: angst

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, none of this really happened.  The author is not associated with or is implying anything about the sexual preferences or the lives of the people depicted within. 

Author´s Notes: This chapter was a bear to write, but it´s finally done now.  And yes, I have finally decided on how many chapters this whole fic is going to have.  Many thanks to Salix for helping me iron the dialog out, and to Elizabeth for her support and enthusiasm.  *mwah*
And coincidentally enough, I finished this on Orlando´s bday.  Happy bday, Orlando!

Posted Jan.  13, 2005

"Luv? Are you okay?"  Orli says, pulling me out of my state of shock. "What´s up?" 

"Henry´s visiting next week," I say. 

"That´s fantastic! I can´t wait to be introduced to him!"  He notices me chewing my lip. "Is something wrong?" 

"I don´t know how I´m going to be able to face him." 

"Huh? What are you going on about?" 

I can´t believe Orli would ask such a dumbass question. "Orli! You just put me on a leash and had me act like a dog! What the fuck kind of father does that make me?" 

"What´s the big deal? It´s not like we did it in front of him." 

Oh...that´s it. There´s no way I´m going to accept him flaunting our kinky sex life around Henry. "You´d expose my son to that perverted shit?" 

His body tenses. "What? I did *not* say that." 

"Yes, you did." 

"And may I point out that you´ve heartily participated in everything I suggested? Don´t be such a fucking hypocrite." 

"*I´m* being a hypocrite? It wasn´t my idea to invite Sean over." 

"Excuse me? *Who* had been drooling over Sean´s arse for ages? And who almost creamed their jeans when he did naughty things to the beer bottle? You should be glad I asked him to tease you," Orli replies, glaring at me. 

"You set that up? Shit, I should have figured -- you never asked me about it first." 

"Bloody hell, Viggo! As your top I´m technically allowed to surprise you as I see fit...but I´ve been doing things carefully with you. I only called in Sean because I knew that you wouldn´t object." 

"So I suppose that I can expect you to force me to my knees and tie me up in front of Henry? Is that what you´re saying?" 

"I never said that! Why in fuck are you twisting everything I say into something else, you twat?" 

"I´m a twat because I´m concerned about my son? Fine."  I turn on my heel and open the closet, retrieving my clothes. 

As I´m dressing, Orli says, "Wait? What in hell are you doing?" 

God damnit! Why does he have to be so dense? "It´s called leaving. I obviously can´t have an intelligent conversation with you about this." 

"What??? Fuck you!"  he starts sputtering. "Get the fuck out of my house!" 

"I was already going before you started yelling. Jesus Christ, you *always* have to get the last word in."  I stalk out the door before he can reply, slamming it behind me. If he´s going to act like a petulant child, I´ll just leave him to have his temper tantrum by himself. 

I get into my car and start it. I have no idea where I´m going to go...all I know is that I need some time alone. I turn towards the countryside and drive, letting the landscape roll by me. The trees have lost their autumn leaves, and I immerse myself in the sight, taking in the color changes and just appreciating the simple beauty of it all. 

The sun is low in the horizon when I finally pull off the road. I wander into a meadow in the distance, squatting down in the grass when I reach my destination. 

I´m facing west, and I smile as the sunset turns the sky into a panorama of soft pastels and brilliant shades of orange. I wish I had my camera with me, so that I could capture the play of the fading light on the trees nearby. The effect would be stunning. 

Sighing, my thoughts turn back to Orli. I can´t believe that he´s being so obtuse about Henry. On the other hand, he´s the baby of his family, so he´s probably never had to think of the effect that any of his actions would have on younger relatives. 

Shit, I should have realized this before we began playing, but I was so intrigued by this new aspect of Orli´s personality that I forgot about the outside world. It´s so easy to lose track of the fact that we´re in our own bubble of reality here in New Zealand, and I´m pretty sure that we can´t go back to being vanilla. Not now. What a fucking mess this has turned out to be. 

***

I groan as I struggle awake the next morning. Alone. I couldn´t figure out a solution to my current dilemma and my mind just went in circles until late last night. I wandered back to my house at that point, since I was getting nowhere. I don´t even remember stumbling into my bed...God, I slept like shit. I´m still tired. 

I need to do something else to take my mind off of things. Today looks like a good day for a ride, so I get dressed and head for the stables. 

Uraeus flicks his ears when he sees me, but he doesn´t give me his usual boisterous greeting, as if he senses that something´s wrong with me. When I walk into his stall with his saddle, he rubs his nose against my face, looking at me with concern. 

"It´s okay," I murmur, patting him. "I just have a lot of things on my mind." 

He bumps his head against me and nickers, shifting uncomfortably. Damn, he must be picking up on my stress. I push everything aside and focus on maintaining a calm demeanor, murmuring nonsense to Uraeus while I continue petting him. 

Once he calms down, I grab all of his gear and I saddle him up. Uraeus bobs his head eagerly as I fasten down the last buckle...looks like he needs to blow off some steam as much as I do. 

Well, I can´t disagree with him. I swing into the saddle and urge him out. Happy to be able to cut loose, Uraeus is soon running across the plains at a full gallop. 

Yeah, I needed this...needed to feel the wind in my hair as the ground speeds past me, needed to lose myself in the pulse of Uraeus´ hoofbeats against the dirt. 

Eventually, he stops to drink some water out of a brook, and that´s when I hear the sound of another rider coming closer. Shit, don´t tell me Orli followed me out here. 

I look up and breathe a sigh of relief when I see that it´s Karl. Well, let´s just hope that he´s out for a quick ride and I can get rid of him. I really don´t feel like talking to anyone. 

Karl pulls up beside me and says, "Morning, Vig. Where´s your other half?" 

"Um, sleeping in." 

He frowns at me and says, "Don´t take the piss with me. You look like shite warmed over. Did something happen?" 

I run my fingers through my hair. "We had a fight." 

"Fuck. Do you want to go out for a pint and bend my ear about it?" 

"No...we just need some breathing room." 

"Viggo..." Karl says, looking at me with concern. Fuck this, I absolutely do not need anyone´s pity right now. 

"Everything´s fine, Karl. Thanks for asking." 

Karl gazes at me skeptically. "All right. But if you need to talk, I´m free to listen."  He gives me a pat on the shoulder. 

"I´m sure everything will be fine on Monday."  Karl decides to leave it at that, and I say my goodbyes to him before I bring Uraeus back. 

The rest of the day was pretty unremarkable. I decided to just sit on my deck, quietly observing everything around me, too distracted to write in my journal. I didn´t really move until nightfall, and once the light faded, I just went in and brooded some more. 

It´s about midnight now, which means that I should give Henry a call. I´m dreading talking to him, but I need to get his flight information. Besides, I haven´t talked to him since last week, and I need to hear his voice again. 

I feel a pang of guilt as I dial Exene´s house. Every time we´ve talked, I´ve deliberately avoided mentioning my relationship with Orlando. I really wanted to save that bit of information until I could see him face to face. And I guess my initial wish to keep shielding him made it so easy for me to ignore the implications of my little play sessions with Orli. However, now Henry´s coming over, and I just can´t avoid it. 

After a few rings, I hear the phone pick up. "Hello?"  Henry says. 

"Hey, how have you been?" 

"Dad! You got my message?"  he says enthusiastically. So far, so good. 

"Yeah. It´s great that managed to get a few more days off. When are you arriving?" 

He rattles off his flight information and then proceeds to update me about his week. He´s doing great in school, and his friends have asked him if he could "bring back one of those cool swords you keep talking about." 

I laugh. "Security´s pretty tight, so I don´t think Peter will allow it. But you can check out Aragorn´s sword, if you want." 

"Really? That´s great! How´s everything going down there?" 

"Crazy. We´ve been filming the Edoras scenes, and Peter had this great set built on top of a hill." 

"Awesome! Does that mean you were actually in Meduseld?" 

I beam at Henry´s enthusiasm. Yeah, this was definitely worth flying out to New Zealand for 15 months. "Uh huh. The WETA people went nuts with the horse motif and just carved variations of it into everything. I´m still stunned by the amount of detail that´s been worked into every object..."

"I bet that means that Orlando has to really pay attention so that he doesn´t trip on something, huh?" 

My throat tightens as soon as Orli´s name is mentioned. Our argument comes rushing back to me. 

"Dad?" 

Damn. I shouldn´t be spacing out like this. "Sorry...another set of rewrites just came in." 

"Sounds like you´re busy again. Maybe I should hang up?" 

Well, that backfired. "You don´t have to..."

"I´ll be over there in a few days. I think I can wait. Don´t worry about it." 

I grin. "All right. I´ll see if I can leave to pick you up. If I can´t make it, I´ll have Peter send someone." 

"Cool. See you soon." 

"Bye, love you lots." 

"Ew! Don´t get all mushy on me! I´m not some *kid*."

I chuckle. "All right, I´ll see you soon. Is that better?" 

"Yeah. Bye, Dad!"  Once I hear him hang up, a feeling of dread settles in. I hope Orli comes back to his senses tomorrow. 

*** I could kick myself for my famous last words to Karl yesterday. To say that Orli and Sean gave me a chilly reception when I walked into the Cuntebago Monday morning is the understatement of the year. I heard them talking quietly as I approached, but once I came in, there was dead silence. So much for hoping that Orli would be reasonable. 

Neither of them said anything to me while we were getting made up, and Orli practically shot out of the trailer as soon as he was elfed. 

Great. Just fucking great. Thank God I don´t have too many scenes with him today. Sean obviously doesn´t want to deal with me, either, so I take off for my set once I´m ready. 

Everyone gives me a wide berth, probably because they can tell that I´m really pissed off and I need my space. Which is definitely a good idea, because a sane person *should* give me some distance today. 

Of course, sane is something that Bernard isn´t. When he sees the expression on my face he says, "I spoke to Karl yesterday. Are things all right with you and Orlando?" 

I make a mental note to slowly torture Karl before I kill him. There´s no way I can dodge this question. I pinch the bridge of my nose and sigh, "No, not really." 

"What happened?" 

So how do I do this without spilling details about our kinky sex life? "Um, we had an argument about certain things..."

"Things?" 

"I´m sorry...it´s really personal. But it does concern our relationship and the fact that Henry´s visiting soon."  I´m hoping at this point that Bernard will take the hint that I need to remain vague. 

Fortunately, he picks up on the discomfort in my body language. "I see...Well, how did Henry react when you told him that you were in love?" 

"Um, I haven´t mentioned it yet." 

Bernard looks at me like I´ve grown another head. "You haven´t? Are you daft?" 

"Look, I didn´t want to drop the bomb that his father is dating someone close to his age over the phone; although that may be a moot point now. Orli doesn´t want to go near me with a ten foot pole." 

Bernard sighs, "What a right mess." 

"Tell me about it," I say, picking at a stray thread on my costume. 

"Will the two of you be able to sort things out?"  he says, squeezing my shoulder for reassurance. 

I close my eyes. "I don´t know." 

---
end part 13

Chapter 14
Chapter 12
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